This Christmas, I Feel His Absence More Than Ever

Six months have passed since my dad died. He was only 73. It feels like it happened just yesterday. I remember that day so clearly. We went to the store to get garlic bread, and I stayed in the car while he went inside. He was taking longer than usual, so after about ten minutes, I went in to check on him. That’s when I found him — collapsed on the floor. He’d had a heart attack and was gone in an instant. It wasn’t supposed to happen like this. It wasn’t supposed to happen so soon. It’s been a nightmare, and it still feels like I’m trapped in it every day.

As I sit here writing this, I can’t stop crying. I just don’t want to believe it. I can’t. My dad won’t be here to walk me down the aisle, to dance with me at my wedding, to hold me in his arms and call me his pumpkin. He won’t get to meet my kids and spoil them like he did me. I feel so lost, like part of me is missing and there’s no way to fill the emptiness.

I know he loved me more than anything else in the world, and I wish I’d told him more often how much I loved him. Dad, wherever you are, I’ll love you forever.

This Christmas will be the first one without him. It’s so hard to imagine a holiday without him here. I miss him more than I can put into words.

First Christmas Without Dad Quote

• “This Christmas, I’ll be raising a toast to the man who taught me the meaning of family, laughter, and love. Miss you, Dad.”
• “The holidays won’t be the same without your booming laughter and warm hugs, Dad. But your spirit lives on in our hearts.”
• “Christmas memories with you, Dad, are like precious ornaments, cherished and treasured forever.”
• “Though you’re no longer here, Dad, your love shines brighter than any Christmas star.”
• “This Christmas, I’ll be holding onto the memories of your favorite carols and the joy you brought to the holidays.”
• “Your absence leaves a void this Christmas, Dad, but your love fills our hearts with warmth and gratitude.”
• “The best gift this Christmas is the memory of your love, Dad. It’s a present that will last forever.”
• “This year, the Christmas lights seem a little dimmer without you, Dad. But your memory shines brighter than ever.”
• “Christmas Eve will always be a time to remember your stories by the fire, Dad. Your voice still echoes in our hearts.”
• “Though you’re not here to hang the stockings this year, Dad, your presence is still felt in every ornament and carol.”